Can't Buy Love: Materialism Kills
Marriages
Focusing too heavily on the "for
richer" part of the nuptial vows could spell disaster for a marriage,
according to research published today by Brigham Young University and William
Paterson University.
In a survey of 1,700 married couples,
researchers found that couples in which one or both partners placed a high
priority on getting or spending money were much less likely to have satisfying and stable marriages.
"Our study found that materialism was
associated with spouses having lower levels of responsiveness and less
emotional maturity. Materialism was also linked to less effective
communication, higher levels of negative conflict, lower relationship
satisfaction, and less marriage stability," said Jason Carroll, a BYU
professor of family life in Provo, Utah, and lead author of the study.
Researchers gauged materialism using self-report
surveys that asked questions such as to what extent do you agree with these
statements? "I like to own things to impress people" or "money
can buy happiness." Spouses were then surveyed on aspects of their
marriage.
For one out of every five couples in the
study, both partners admitted a strong love of money. These couples were worse
off in terms of marriage stability, marriage satisfaction, communications
skills and other metrics of healthy matrimony that researchers studied.
The one out of seven couples that reported
low-levels of materialism in both partners scored 10 to 15 percent higher in
all metrics of marital quality and satisfaction. Interestingly, the correlation
between materialism and marital difficulties remained stable regardless of the
actual wealth of the couple.
The Things That Money Just Can't
Buy
Study authors and marriage experts noted that
the findings probably have to do with the personality traits that go along with
materialism. They will be published today in the Journal of Couple &
Relationship Therapy.
"The finding does not necessarily mean
that it is the materialism itself that damages their relationships. ... A
materialistic orientation may be associated with other unidentified factors,
such as childhood deprivation or neglect, which might play a more pivotal role
in adult marital satisfaction," said Don Catherall, professor of clinical
psychiatry and behavioral sciences at Northwestern University in Chicago.
"Of course, it may also simply mean that people who are more focused on
making money have less energy and interest left to invest in their
marriages."
Other studies have shown that materialism is
correlated with a host of personality traits and interpersonal skills that
might hinder a marriage.
"People who are materialistic tend to be
narcissistic and concerned with impressing people," said Susan Heitler, a
Denver-based clinical psychologist and creator of marriage resource site Poweroftwomarriage.com. "They
have a tendency to be anxious, depressed, have relatively poor relationship
skills and have low self-esteem. These qualities in turn can cause marital
problems."
Heitler recalls one patient who said that
whenever she felt empty in her relationship, she would "fill up the
hole" by buying lots of things and this would make her feel better. Her
husband, who didn't share this love of buying, would then "kindly return
all of it because they couldn't afford what she had bought," Heitler
recounted, "and the wife was grateful that he would return it because she
didn't really want the stuff in the end, but she got satisfaction from the
purchasing."
By
COURTNEY HUTCHISON, ABC News Medical Unit, Oct. 13, 2011
Full length article +
Video from ABC News
Song: Money The Beatles http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9k5ooaufrLM
Song: Can’t buy me love The Beatles http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=524BS0thExg
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