June 25 2015 Blog Topic (Thursday)

Please read the strange resume, make some decisions, form an opinion, and prepare to discuss.

See you in class!

Matthew

The Best, or Worst Resume Ever

The following is a copy of an actual resume submitted to a company by a man named Eric.

Some of the details have been edited out to protect his privacy.

Is it the worst resume ever or is it actually quite brilliant?  You decide.

Eric

hgsrfhrfthertherfghsdfghdfhgdffghdfhfdhg

dfgdshdfghdfghdfghdffgh

OBJECTIVES

To claw my way to the top using any means necessary…. but then be a fair and just ruler, and bring your company to new heights, or whatever.

PERSONAL ATTRIBUTES

Cat-like reflexes – now you see me, meow you don’t

Possible ESP

Knows when to hold, knows when to fold

Emits pleasant aroma(s)

Horse-like laugh (optional)

Extremely proficient at Mariokart for Super Nintendo

Not bad at “sexy” dancing

29 years old but have the facial hair of a 13 year old

Can eat a LOT at one sitting.  Oh, also, I can moonwalk quite well

EXPERIENCE

I am quite experienced with the McDonald’s menu

One time I rode a horse but it bucked me off.  I was injured and ended up gaining like 30lbs but then I shed that weight like a snakeskin, very fast metabolism.

I have enough knowledge to write an essay on pretty much any subject (without researching it)

Acne lancer

Life coach

EDUCATION

Finished high school by the skin of my teeth (1999)

Spent most of time daydreaming out window but if you hire me things will be different, I swear.

REFERENCE

Eric

Who better to tell  you about me than…. me.

Holla!  4353452345dfdfgd2345                  

Source Material:-     http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2011/04/18/resume-fail-or-win_n_850353.html
Related:-   http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/11/08/funny-resumes-cover-letters_n_2092762.html

Discussion Questions

With your partner, discuss the following questions. Feel free to ask any follow-on questions you like.

1.     Would you hire someone who claimed to have “cat-like reflexes”, and to be “not bad at sexy dancing” on their resume?

2.     What special talents do you have that you wouldn’t put in your resume?

(for example:- can you chug a beer in 3 seconds, burp the alphabet, or play tunes with your armpit?)

3.     What is the most important part of a resume? 

If you were hiring, what would be the first thing you would look for?

4.     When you write your resume, are you completely honest? 

Do you exaggerate, or even lie about your abilities and experience?

5.     What information about yourself would you try to keep hidden from a potential employer?

Speed Interviews

  You need to hire someone to help you right away!  Think up two or three interview type questions that are designed to assess a person’s character.  You are not interested in their work experience or education or qualifications.  You simply want to determine what sort of personality they have and whether or not you would like to work with that person based on their personality type. 

·      You can ask them about their thoughts, opinions and feelings. 

·      You cannot ask them for facts about their employment history or academic achievements. 

  Think about the type of person you would like to work with and would get along well with.  Once you have come up with some questions, ask them to your classmates.  Take notes.  Based on their answers, decide who you think you would most like to work with.  Afterwards, you may be asked to explain your choice to the rest of the class.